Barnett, Kristine. The Spark: A Mother's Story of Nurturing Genius. (2013).
Appropriate for: Anyone interested in autistic prodigies
Maybe it's my own personal issues of jealously of autistic prodigies, but I could not like this book. Barnett is the mother of Jake, a math genius on track to win a Nobel Prize after being told by his school district that he may never read. If you don't have an autistic child, this is a fascinating story of the discovery of true genius, but, if you do, and he's not a genius, it's just a depressing reminder that most of us don't get that silver lining of "he may be really weird, but he's getting paid to do research with the greatest professors in the country!" And no matter how self-deprecating the author tries to be, comments like this about her youngest son, "Every parent think that his or her newborn is perfect, but Ethan actually was" and, about her marriage, "Outside of romance novels, perhaps, people don't talk seriously about the kind of love that makes anything possible. But Michael and I have that kind of love," make her very difficult to like. She also portrays herself as a groundbreaking strategist: "I came up with an intervention . . . there's a scale. When someone you love dies, that 's a ten on the scale." I don't need to explain it further, because we all know the scale model to put emotions in perspective, and I'm pretty sure she did not come up with that idea first. The book is full of stories about she precipitated the breakthroughs for many autistic children of all ages. I'm not saying that she hasn't struggled; her health and financial issues make that plain. But my biggest issue is this: She is not having the typical experience of a mother with an autistic child. There's no way she could. If your child is a prodigy, people give you a pass. And mothers who have been asked as many times as I have, "Does your son do anything really, really well? Play the piano? Count cards?" and seen the look of disappointment and pity on the questioners' faces when you say no, know what I'm talking about.
Bertelli, Yantra, Jennifer Silverman, and Sarah Talbot (eds.). My Baby Rides the Short Bus: The Unabashedly Human Experience of Raising Kids with Disabilities. (2009).
Appropriate for: Anyone interested in learning more about what daily life is like for families with a special needs child
I stumbled upon the editors of this book while they were speaking on National Public Radio. After hearing only a few sentences from one of the women about her child’s tantrums, I knew she was talking about autism. I first turned to this book when I felt isolated in the world of “typical” children and parents. It is a collection of essays about children with disabilities ranging from physical to mental, mild to severe. Some of the essays talk of such extreme cases, I couldn’t relate to them even though I wanted to. The tone is overwhelmingly “we’re in this together,” depending on your mood it will either lift you up or depress you. Many of the voices are raised in frustration that the “typicals” don’t understand us, but, unfortunately, the writers are preaching to the choir. I doubt those we really want to read it will.
Bushard, Andrew. 17+ Tips to Master Communication with Autism and Asperger’s Syndrome. (2015).
Appropriate for: Those on the spectrum looking for an explanation of what communication skills they may find challenging and for anyone not on the spectrum who would like insight into the autistic perspective from someone on the spectrum
I struggled a bit regarding where to place this review and I ultimately decided "Memoir" because I think for those visiting this site, most are not on the spectrum and are very interested in the perspective of someone who is. The author, a self-described Aspie, lays out his personal journey of self-discovery and self-improvement in this 30-page pamphlet. In a conversational tone, he offers a range of communication advice from personal experience such as "ask, don't demand" and eliminate "um" when speaking. He offers a list of recommended readings at the end of each short chapter.
Fields-Meyer, Tom. Following Ezra: What One Father Learned About Gumby, Otters, Autism, and Love from His
Extraordinary Son. (2011).
Appropriate for: Everyone
As a parent of a child on the spectrum there’s a lot to relate to here—the tantrums in the toy stores, the odd obsessions, and
the direct questions aimed at strangers. Fields-Meyer writes a gentle tribute to his autistic son while revealing the everyday challenges of trying to help his son while still appreciating who he is and all that that entails, whether that means scouring ebay for Gumby dolls or listening patiently to his son tell him ad nauseum about the running times of Disney films. It’s easy to get caught up
in the patience-testing repetitiveness and rigidity but, as Fields-Meyer tells, it’s much easier to handle when you can look back on it with humor and a true appreciation for how unique these kids are.
Finch, David, The Journal of Best Practices: A Memoir of Marriage, Asperger Syndrome, and One Man’s Quest to Be a Better Husband. (2012).
Appropriate for: Adults with or without autism
Like John Elder Robinson’s Look Me in the Eye, this is a remarkable inside look at life as an autistic adult. Finch creates a
Journal of Best Practices after his wife, Kristen (a speech therapist), informally diagnoses him with Asperger’s (he later makes it official). After he’s married, he’s no longer highly motivated to be a charming boyfriend who made it his mission to understand Kirsten’s world (he studied fashion magazines to learn about “girly interests”). Instead, he gets comfortable in his egocentric world in which he folds only his own clothes, takes hour-long showers, and is more inflexible than their two toddler children. As he studies
his autism as it relates to his marriage, he learns valuable lessons such as, “Apologies do not count when you shout them,” “Kristen needs time in the morning to shower and get ready for work,” and “When building towers [with the kids], figuring out the best and worst things to say to pregnant women can wait. Pay attention!” I particularly liked his observations about his empathy, or lack therof. He quizzes his wife about the empathy concept, “’What if I give a shit, but just barely? Would that count? What if I can determine
what someone else if feeling, but I can’t actually feel it myself?’” He ultimately concludes that “engaging in the social world without empathy is like going to the mall without any money or pants on; it can be done, but you’re bound to have problems.” He writes about his deficits, “embarrassing myself at a cocktail party is one thing. Not being able to recognize when Kristen needs my support is something else entirely.” It’s very hopeful to read about Finch’s sincere dedication to understanding and modifying his own behavior. His journey is funny, insightful, and optimistic.
Foust, Rebecca. Dark Card. (2008).
Appropriate for: parents of those with special needs
Foust is angry. Her collection of poems in Dark Cardreveal the rage of a mother struggling with how she and her son have been treated by health professionals, strangers in the grocery store, teachers, and school yard bullies, just to name a few. In “Dark Card,” I can relate to her when, in the face of scorn, “It’s my plea / to exorcise their pitchforks and torches, / to conjure Bill Gates when they see him, / or Einstein, not Kaczynski or Columbine; / perhaps they’ll think him delightfully odd.” But her on-target observations are too brutally
sarcastic. In “Apologies to My OB-GYN,”she writes, “Sorry that my boy birthed himself / too early, took up so much room / in your prenatal nursery.” In “Like Dostoyevsky’s,” she states that “My boy loves who he is, / even if the world does not appreciate how he fills his days with keyboard tapping, rereading his inscrutable D & D books / and pacing and humming.” I get the sense that she’s not okay with it either yet. I just hope that the heartbreak that these poems express has healed since the publication of these poems.
Grandin, Temple, Ph.D., and Sean Barron. The Unwritten Rules of Social Relationships: Decoding Social Mysteries Through the
Unique Perspectives of Autism. (2005).
Appropriate for: Parents of children with and adults with autistic spectrum disorders
This is a fascinating look into the thoughts of two very well-spoken adults with autism. Together they compiled a list of ten unwritten
rules of social relationships such as “Rule #3: Everyone in the World Makes Mistakes. It Doesn’t Have to Ruin Your Day” and “Rule #8: Know When You’re Turning People Off.” This is information that neurotypicals know naturally or learn easily (for example, don’t insult your boss to his face), but people with autism find illogical or frustrating. Grandin is a self-proclaimed visual/logical thinker, while Barron is more emotional. Both authors emphasize the need for a strong foundation of self-esteem, motivation, and critical-thinking skills for a successful life. For Grandin, the skills/hobbies training for job/career/work is what’s most important, not her social
relationships. The authors assert that you can teach skills but it never really means anything to a person when he or she navigates the world if the person never really understands it. Many autistic people feel emotional bonding or relatedness. The focus on social skills that started in the early 2000s didn’t simultaneously focus on “talent” development and executive functioning, to prepare people for the work force, which the book views as a problem. “The goal,” Temple writes, “of any intervention program should be to provide the individual with knowledge and practical tools to help him succeed within the world around him. The goal is not to make a person with autism ‘normal’ or ‘typical,’ to transform him into someone his is not . . . but to enhance his strengths and teach him to maneuver around his difficulties.” Co-author Barron draws on the emotional component that often left him full of rage and depression
at those around him. By applying the unwritten rules he was able to understand how to work within the neurotypical social context. It’s heartening to read that they are both “happy, independent, functioning adults,” even though they faced many enormous challenges in childhood, like so many autistic kids do. And both authors credit their parents’ determination with how far they have come. Sometimes that’s all the motivation I need to keep plugging away.
Grandin, Temple, Ph.D., and Catherine Johnson. Animals Make Us Human: Creating the Best Life for Animals. (2009).
Appropriate for: Anyone interested in gaining some insight into the thought processes of someone with Asperger’s
This is not a book about autism, but it is fascinating look at how autism allows Grandin great insight into the behavior of animals. Her premise is that animals and people have “blue-ribbon emotions” in the brain: seeking (the “impulse to search, investigate, and make sense of the environment”), rage, fear, panic, lust, care, and play. What Grandin’s autism allows her to see is that many animals in captivity stim because they are in deprived, barren environments. And just like autistic people who stim, they need to be redirected into more stimulating, enriched environments. Grandin’s writing style is methodical and thorough. She tells you everything she knows. Without emotion and with clear prose, you gain insight not just into animals, but people too.
Higashida, Naoki, with an introduction by David Mitchell. The Reason I Jump: The Inner Voice of a Thirteen-Year-Old-Boy with Autism. (2013).
Appropriate for: Everyone
I finally picked up this book after I saw David Mitchell on The Daily Show, and after reading it, my reasons for my initial hesitation were justified. I don't know if this is the authentic work of a nonverbal Japanese teen (I have my doubts because of the controversy surrounding facilitated communication and because what can be lost in translation from Japanese to English), but my biggest issue is that those outside the autism community have latched on to this as some sort of autism manifesto. The author constantly generalizes and what's the one thing we all know to be true about autism? You can't generalize. For example, in answer to the horribly general question, "Would you give us an example of something people with autism really enjoy?" he says that "We do take pleasure in . . . making friends with nature. The reason we aren't much good at people skills is that we think too much about what sort of impression we're making on the other person, or how we should be responding to this or that. But nature is always there at hand to wrap us up gently: glowing, swaying, bubbling, rustling." I was fairly confident this was not true for my son and I checked with him and he laughed that he doesn't really care what kind of impression he's making and he would much rather make friends with Minecraft than with nature. I'm incredibly frustrated that this sort of book becomes popular. In the autism community it gives false hope that all nonverbal autistic children are having deep thoughts about nature and about how their overarching concerns are about how their disability is impacting their caregivers (a constant refrain), and in the general public, it gives an oversimplified view of one individual's experience, but I believe it is truly not representative of the autistic brain.
McCarthy, Jenny. Louder Than Words: A Mother’s Journey in Healing Autism. (2007).
Appropriate for: Parents of young children on the spectrum
Actress McCarthy’s first book about her son’s autism is a frantic retelling in excruciating detail of her son’s seizures and subsequent diagnosis of and treatment for autism. She proudly claims that her “mommy instinct” and degree from the “University of Google” plays a large role in her care and treatment. There is a lot to relate to here for mothers—the evaluations, charting a course for treatment, the breakdown of friendships and marriage, how expensive treatment is—but beyond that she is divisive and destruction. She categorizes moms in two distinct camps: the “woe is me” moms who enjoy the victim role and the “I’ll try anything if it will help my kid recover” moms who believe that vaccines caused their children’s’ autism and follow the course of alternative medicines: the GFCF diet, chelation, B12 shots, hyperbaric chamber treatments, etc. As most of us know, there are many of us who do not fall into either category. She notes that other moms who didn’t think autism is caused by vaccines, even if their children regressed after vaccination, leaves her “baffled.” Why? It shouldn’t. It’s because vaccines don’t cause autism She is a fervent proponent of the DAN! Protocol to “fix” her baby. Ultimately, this book is irresponsible, extolling the virtues of very bad science. At the very least it causes problems for moms who have to hear “Didn’t Jenny McCarthy cure her son?” from lay people. At worst it sends vulnerable parents in the misguided direction.
McCarthy, Jenny. Mother Warriors: A Nation of Parents Healing Autism Against All Odds. (2008).
Appropriate for: Parents of children on the spectrum
This is McCarthy’s follow-up to Louder Than Words: A Mother’s Journey in Healing Autism, her memoir of her experience of her son Evan’s diagnosis of autism. This is a pointed story of her fight to get the word out about autism-causing vaccines and biomedical treatments for autism. Her dedication states that “Our voices will shake the ground of those who were responsible until all of our children are safe from harm.” She puts the blame squarely on vaccines for causing autism and speaks only of children who regressed after receiving the MMR vaccine; she does not mention any children on the spectrum who never regressed, always showed signs, even before being vaccinated, and children who have autism and do not have any “leaky gut” issues. She spews furious talk toward the entire medical community and when anyone suggests that her information is inaccurate, she play the “mommy instinct” trump card. She uses words like “recover” and “heal” and stops just short of “cure.” She relies on Google as her main source of information. One of her “warriors” writes, “once I fixed the autism, it was easy for [my husband] to pass [our son] off as normal.” McCarthy’s tone is angry and she comes off as a mother very new to the world of autism. She says “ no one talks about the siblings” but that is far from true. She bullies people; she claims that genetics are involved is a “cop-out.” One mother in the book cites Andrew Wakefield’s research regarding supplements and diet; he is a source that has been widely discredited. McCarthy also says that, “Miracles can happen, faith can move mountains, and doctors need to learn about a medicine called Hope.” Yet, instead of offering hope, she serves up anger and fear-mongering. The mothers who proudly call themselves fanatics aren’t the only warriors out there. If you ever read any of McCarthy’s books, you should immediately follow them up with Paul Offit’s Autism’s False Prophets.
Montague-Reyes, Karen. Circling Normal: A Book about Autism. (2007).
Appropriate for: Everyone
Cartoonist Montague-Reyes draws from her own experiences with her autistic son. This collection of strips, culled from her syndicated daily strip Clear Blue Water, and takes a humorous look at life when it turns upside down. And which one of us hasn’t silently cursed that mommy in the park with the precocious child in her own thought bubble?
Prince-Hughes, Dawn, Ph.D. Songs of the Gorilla Nation: My Journey Through Autism. (2004).
Read this if: You are interested in a memoir by a women with Asperger’s
This memoir is an articulate telling of how the author connected with the gorillas in the Seattle Zoo. Diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome at 35, the author’s childhood was full of painful alienation, sensory issues, and concerted effort to pass as “normal.” Now a writer and researcher with a Ph.D., a partner, a son, and a few friends, her success story is not without it’s painful moments. She left school because her teachers did not understand her and she drifted for years—homeless, into drugs and alcohol, and working as an erotic dancer. During that time she stared to visit the zoo and began to write about the gorillas as she watched them. She understood and identified with them as “captives;” they were both living a “forced way of being.” She learned from them emotions that she had trouble understanding herself, such as anger, concern, humor, motivation, even religious sentiment. She wrote the book after finally understanding and accepting herself and in an effort to explain that “I and the others who are autistic do not want to be cured.” Prince-Hughes’ defining statement is, “Only after an accurate diagnosis of autism is made can a person begin to understand why they are the way they are and why they always have been this way; only then can they begin to . . . accept the gifts they offer the future.”
Robison, John Elder. Look Me in the Eye: My Life with Asperger’s. (2007).
Appropriate for: Adults with autism or parents of children on the spectrum
The brother of Augusten Burroughs, acclaimed author of the memoir Running with Scissors, Robison has written his own memoir of growing up without a diagnosis. When he was diagnosed at forty (a therapist friend suggested he fit the criteria), he was greatly relieved to understand why he “doesn’t do ‘normal’” and to finally realize that “I was normal, for what I am.” This book is an articulate insight into the challenges someone with autism faces, especially without support. Robison has known loneliness and been treated poorly. He was rigid, anxious, rejected, and lacked empathy and in response those around him got angry, impatient, and frustrated. He ultimately learned social skills on his own and after dropping out of high school, found his niche with local musicians as an engineer which led to touring with KISS, a job at Milton Bradley, and he ultimately opened his own car repair and restoration shop. After all the challenges, leaving school, struggling with personal relationships, and missed job opportunities, he discovers that having Asperger’s “isn’t all bad.” Robison asserts that it can “bestow rare gifts,” particularly the powers of concentration. His whole story is wonderful, but he has a few chapters (“Empathy,” “One with the Machine,” and “Logic vs. Small Talk”) that stand alone as great insights into how those with autism think differently from those who are “normal.” One insight the book provides is into how attitudes toward those with autism have come a long way. “Rather than take a close and sympathetic look at me, it proved easier and less controversial for the professionals to say I was just lazy, or angry, or defiant.” But most of all, this is a hopeful story of one man who has struggled to create a very successful professional and personal life (he has a son and is happily remarried). Robison states, “I am proud to be an Aspergian.” And in response to the oft-heard command of the title, he says “In fact, I don’t really understand why it’s considered normal to stare at someone’s eyeballs.”
Appropriate for: Anyone interested in autistic prodigies
Maybe it's my own personal issues of jealously of autistic prodigies, but I could not like this book. Barnett is the mother of Jake, a math genius on track to win a Nobel Prize after being told by his school district that he may never read. If you don't have an autistic child, this is a fascinating story of the discovery of true genius, but, if you do, and he's not a genius, it's just a depressing reminder that most of us don't get that silver lining of "he may be really weird, but he's getting paid to do research with the greatest professors in the country!" And no matter how self-deprecating the author tries to be, comments like this about her youngest son, "Every parent think that his or her newborn is perfect, but Ethan actually was" and, about her marriage, "Outside of romance novels, perhaps, people don't talk seriously about the kind of love that makes anything possible. But Michael and I have that kind of love," make her very difficult to like. She also portrays herself as a groundbreaking strategist: "I came up with an intervention . . . there's a scale. When someone you love dies, that 's a ten on the scale." I don't need to explain it further, because we all know the scale model to put emotions in perspective, and I'm pretty sure she did not come up with that idea first. The book is full of stories about she precipitated the breakthroughs for many autistic children of all ages. I'm not saying that she hasn't struggled; her health and financial issues make that plain. But my biggest issue is this: She is not having the typical experience of a mother with an autistic child. There's no way she could. If your child is a prodigy, people give you a pass. And mothers who have been asked as many times as I have, "Does your son do anything really, really well? Play the piano? Count cards?" and seen the look of disappointment and pity on the questioners' faces when you say no, know what I'm talking about.
Bertelli, Yantra, Jennifer Silverman, and Sarah Talbot (eds.). My Baby Rides the Short Bus: The Unabashedly Human Experience of Raising Kids with Disabilities. (2009).
Appropriate for: Anyone interested in learning more about what daily life is like for families with a special needs child
I stumbled upon the editors of this book while they were speaking on National Public Radio. After hearing only a few sentences from one of the women about her child’s tantrums, I knew she was talking about autism. I first turned to this book when I felt isolated in the world of “typical” children and parents. It is a collection of essays about children with disabilities ranging from physical to mental, mild to severe. Some of the essays talk of such extreme cases, I couldn’t relate to them even though I wanted to. The tone is overwhelmingly “we’re in this together,” depending on your mood it will either lift you up or depress you. Many of the voices are raised in frustration that the “typicals” don’t understand us, but, unfortunately, the writers are preaching to the choir. I doubt those we really want to read it will.
Bushard, Andrew. 17+ Tips to Master Communication with Autism and Asperger’s Syndrome. (2015).
Appropriate for: Those on the spectrum looking for an explanation of what communication skills they may find challenging and for anyone not on the spectrum who would like insight into the autistic perspective from someone on the spectrum
I struggled a bit regarding where to place this review and I ultimately decided "Memoir" because I think for those visiting this site, most are not on the spectrum and are very interested in the perspective of someone who is. The author, a self-described Aspie, lays out his personal journey of self-discovery and self-improvement in this 30-page pamphlet. In a conversational tone, he offers a range of communication advice from personal experience such as "ask, don't demand" and eliminate "um" when speaking. He offers a list of recommended readings at the end of each short chapter.
Fields-Meyer, Tom. Following Ezra: What One Father Learned About Gumby, Otters, Autism, and Love from His
Extraordinary Son. (2011).
Appropriate for: Everyone
As a parent of a child on the spectrum there’s a lot to relate to here—the tantrums in the toy stores, the odd obsessions, and
the direct questions aimed at strangers. Fields-Meyer writes a gentle tribute to his autistic son while revealing the everyday challenges of trying to help his son while still appreciating who he is and all that that entails, whether that means scouring ebay for Gumby dolls or listening patiently to his son tell him ad nauseum about the running times of Disney films. It’s easy to get caught up
in the patience-testing repetitiveness and rigidity but, as Fields-Meyer tells, it’s much easier to handle when you can look back on it with humor and a true appreciation for how unique these kids are.
Finch, David, The Journal of Best Practices: A Memoir of Marriage, Asperger Syndrome, and One Man’s Quest to Be a Better Husband. (2012).
Appropriate for: Adults with or without autism
Like John Elder Robinson’s Look Me in the Eye, this is a remarkable inside look at life as an autistic adult. Finch creates a
Journal of Best Practices after his wife, Kristen (a speech therapist), informally diagnoses him with Asperger’s (he later makes it official). After he’s married, he’s no longer highly motivated to be a charming boyfriend who made it his mission to understand Kirsten’s world (he studied fashion magazines to learn about “girly interests”). Instead, he gets comfortable in his egocentric world in which he folds only his own clothes, takes hour-long showers, and is more inflexible than their two toddler children. As he studies
his autism as it relates to his marriage, he learns valuable lessons such as, “Apologies do not count when you shout them,” “Kristen needs time in the morning to shower and get ready for work,” and “When building towers [with the kids], figuring out the best and worst things to say to pregnant women can wait. Pay attention!” I particularly liked his observations about his empathy, or lack therof. He quizzes his wife about the empathy concept, “’What if I give a shit, but just barely? Would that count? What if I can determine
what someone else if feeling, but I can’t actually feel it myself?’” He ultimately concludes that “engaging in the social world without empathy is like going to the mall without any money or pants on; it can be done, but you’re bound to have problems.” He writes about his deficits, “embarrassing myself at a cocktail party is one thing. Not being able to recognize when Kristen needs my support is something else entirely.” It’s very hopeful to read about Finch’s sincere dedication to understanding and modifying his own behavior. His journey is funny, insightful, and optimistic.
Foust, Rebecca. Dark Card. (2008).
Appropriate for: parents of those with special needs
Foust is angry. Her collection of poems in Dark Cardreveal the rage of a mother struggling with how she and her son have been treated by health professionals, strangers in the grocery store, teachers, and school yard bullies, just to name a few. In “Dark Card,” I can relate to her when, in the face of scorn, “It’s my plea / to exorcise their pitchforks and torches, / to conjure Bill Gates when they see him, / or Einstein, not Kaczynski or Columbine; / perhaps they’ll think him delightfully odd.” But her on-target observations are too brutally
sarcastic. In “Apologies to My OB-GYN,”she writes, “Sorry that my boy birthed himself / too early, took up so much room / in your prenatal nursery.” In “Like Dostoyevsky’s,” she states that “My boy loves who he is, / even if the world does not appreciate how he fills his days with keyboard tapping, rereading his inscrutable D & D books / and pacing and humming.” I get the sense that she’s not okay with it either yet. I just hope that the heartbreak that these poems express has healed since the publication of these poems.
Grandin, Temple, Ph.D., and Sean Barron. The Unwritten Rules of Social Relationships: Decoding Social Mysteries Through the
Unique Perspectives of Autism. (2005).
Appropriate for: Parents of children with and adults with autistic spectrum disorders
This is a fascinating look into the thoughts of two very well-spoken adults with autism. Together they compiled a list of ten unwritten
rules of social relationships such as “Rule #3: Everyone in the World Makes Mistakes. It Doesn’t Have to Ruin Your Day” and “Rule #8: Know When You’re Turning People Off.” This is information that neurotypicals know naturally or learn easily (for example, don’t insult your boss to his face), but people with autism find illogical or frustrating. Grandin is a self-proclaimed visual/logical thinker, while Barron is more emotional. Both authors emphasize the need for a strong foundation of self-esteem, motivation, and critical-thinking skills for a successful life. For Grandin, the skills/hobbies training for job/career/work is what’s most important, not her social
relationships. The authors assert that you can teach skills but it never really means anything to a person when he or she navigates the world if the person never really understands it. Many autistic people feel emotional bonding or relatedness. The focus on social skills that started in the early 2000s didn’t simultaneously focus on “talent” development and executive functioning, to prepare people for the work force, which the book views as a problem. “The goal,” Temple writes, “of any intervention program should be to provide the individual with knowledge and practical tools to help him succeed within the world around him. The goal is not to make a person with autism ‘normal’ or ‘typical,’ to transform him into someone his is not . . . but to enhance his strengths and teach him to maneuver around his difficulties.” Co-author Barron draws on the emotional component that often left him full of rage and depression
at those around him. By applying the unwritten rules he was able to understand how to work within the neurotypical social context. It’s heartening to read that they are both “happy, independent, functioning adults,” even though they faced many enormous challenges in childhood, like so many autistic kids do. And both authors credit their parents’ determination with how far they have come. Sometimes that’s all the motivation I need to keep plugging away.
Grandin, Temple, Ph.D., and Catherine Johnson. Animals Make Us Human: Creating the Best Life for Animals. (2009).
Appropriate for: Anyone interested in gaining some insight into the thought processes of someone with Asperger’s
This is not a book about autism, but it is fascinating look at how autism allows Grandin great insight into the behavior of animals. Her premise is that animals and people have “blue-ribbon emotions” in the brain: seeking (the “impulse to search, investigate, and make sense of the environment”), rage, fear, panic, lust, care, and play. What Grandin’s autism allows her to see is that many animals in captivity stim because they are in deprived, barren environments. And just like autistic people who stim, they need to be redirected into more stimulating, enriched environments. Grandin’s writing style is methodical and thorough. She tells you everything she knows. Without emotion and with clear prose, you gain insight not just into animals, but people too.
Higashida, Naoki, with an introduction by David Mitchell. The Reason I Jump: The Inner Voice of a Thirteen-Year-Old-Boy with Autism. (2013).
Appropriate for: Everyone
I finally picked up this book after I saw David Mitchell on The Daily Show, and after reading it, my reasons for my initial hesitation were justified. I don't know if this is the authentic work of a nonverbal Japanese teen (I have my doubts because of the controversy surrounding facilitated communication and because what can be lost in translation from Japanese to English), but my biggest issue is that those outside the autism community have latched on to this as some sort of autism manifesto. The author constantly generalizes and what's the one thing we all know to be true about autism? You can't generalize. For example, in answer to the horribly general question, "Would you give us an example of something people with autism really enjoy?" he says that "We do take pleasure in . . . making friends with nature. The reason we aren't much good at people skills is that we think too much about what sort of impression we're making on the other person, or how we should be responding to this or that. But nature is always there at hand to wrap us up gently: glowing, swaying, bubbling, rustling." I was fairly confident this was not true for my son and I checked with him and he laughed that he doesn't really care what kind of impression he's making and he would much rather make friends with Minecraft than with nature. I'm incredibly frustrated that this sort of book becomes popular. In the autism community it gives false hope that all nonverbal autistic children are having deep thoughts about nature and about how their overarching concerns are about how their disability is impacting their caregivers (a constant refrain), and in the general public, it gives an oversimplified view of one individual's experience, but I believe it is truly not representative of the autistic brain.
McCarthy, Jenny. Louder Than Words: A Mother’s Journey in Healing Autism. (2007).
Appropriate for: Parents of young children on the spectrum
Actress McCarthy’s first book about her son’s autism is a frantic retelling in excruciating detail of her son’s seizures and subsequent diagnosis of and treatment for autism. She proudly claims that her “mommy instinct” and degree from the “University of Google” plays a large role in her care and treatment. There is a lot to relate to here for mothers—the evaluations, charting a course for treatment, the breakdown of friendships and marriage, how expensive treatment is—but beyond that she is divisive and destruction. She categorizes moms in two distinct camps: the “woe is me” moms who enjoy the victim role and the “I’ll try anything if it will help my kid recover” moms who believe that vaccines caused their children’s’ autism and follow the course of alternative medicines: the GFCF diet, chelation, B12 shots, hyperbaric chamber treatments, etc. As most of us know, there are many of us who do not fall into either category. She notes that other moms who didn’t think autism is caused by vaccines, even if their children regressed after vaccination, leaves her “baffled.” Why? It shouldn’t. It’s because vaccines don’t cause autism She is a fervent proponent of the DAN! Protocol to “fix” her baby. Ultimately, this book is irresponsible, extolling the virtues of very bad science. At the very least it causes problems for moms who have to hear “Didn’t Jenny McCarthy cure her son?” from lay people. At worst it sends vulnerable parents in the misguided direction.
McCarthy, Jenny. Mother Warriors: A Nation of Parents Healing Autism Against All Odds. (2008).
Appropriate for: Parents of children on the spectrum
This is McCarthy’s follow-up to Louder Than Words: A Mother’s Journey in Healing Autism, her memoir of her experience of her son Evan’s diagnosis of autism. This is a pointed story of her fight to get the word out about autism-causing vaccines and biomedical treatments for autism. Her dedication states that “Our voices will shake the ground of those who were responsible until all of our children are safe from harm.” She puts the blame squarely on vaccines for causing autism and speaks only of children who regressed after receiving the MMR vaccine; she does not mention any children on the spectrum who never regressed, always showed signs, even before being vaccinated, and children who have autism and do not have any “leaky gut” issues. She spews furious talk toward the entire medical community and when anyone suggests that her information is inaccurate, she play the “mommy instinct” trump card. She uses words like “recover” and “heal” and stops just short of “cure.” She relies on Google as her main source of information. One of her “warriors” writes, “once I fixed the autism, it was easy for [my husband] to pass [our son] off as normal.” McCarthy’s tone is angry and she comes off as a mother very new to the world of autism. She says “ no one talks about the siblings” but that is far from true. She bullies people; she claims that genetics are involved is a “cop-out.” One mother in the book cites Andrew Wakefield’s research regarding supplements and diet; he is a source that has been widely discredited. McCarthy also says that, “Miracles can happen, faith can move mountains, and doctors need to learn about a medicine called Hope.” Yet, instead of offering hope, she serves up anger and fear-mongering. The mothers who proudly call themselves fanatics aren’t the only warriors out there. If you ever read any of McCarthy’s books, you should immediately follow them up with Paul Offit’s Autism’s False Prophets.
Montague-Reyes, Karen. Circling Normal: A Book about Autism. (2007).
Appropriate for: Everyone
Cartoonist Montague-Reyes draws from her own experiences with her autistic son. This collection of strips, culled from her syndicated daily strip Clear Blue Water, and takes a humorous look at life when it turns upside down. And which one of us hasn’t silently cursed that mommy in the park with the precocious child in her own thought bubble?
Prince-Hughes, Dawn, Ph.D. Songs of the Gorilla Nation: My Journey Through Autism. (2004).
Read this if: You are interested in a memoir by a women with Asperger’s
This memoir is an articulate telling of how the author connected with the gorillas in the Seattle Zoo. Diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome at 35, the author’s childhood was full of painful alienation, sensory issues, and concerted effort to pass as “normal.” Now a writer and researcher with a Ph.D., a partner, a son, and a few friends, her success story is not without it’s painful moments. She left school because her teachers did not understand her and she drifted for years—homeless, into drugs and alcohol, and working as an erotic dancer. During that time she stared to visit the zoo and began to write about the gorillas as she watched them. She understood and identified with them as “captives;” they were both living a “forced way of being.” She learned from them emotions that she had trouble understanding herself, such as anger, concern, humor, motivation, even religious sentiment. She wrote the book after finally understanding and accepting herself and in an effort to explain that “I and the others who are autistic do not want to be cured.” Prince-Hughes’ defining statement is, “Only after an accurate diagnosis of autism is made can a person begin to understand why they are the way they are and why they always have been this way; only then can they begin to . . . accept the gifts they offer the future.”
Robison, John Elder. Look Me in the Eye: My Life with Asperger’s. (2007).
Appropriate for: Adults with autism or parents of children on the spectrum
The brother of Augusten Burroughs, acclaimed author of the memoir Running with Scissors, Robison has written his own memoir of growing up without a diagnosis. When he was diagnosed at forty (a therapist friend suggested he fit the criteria), he was greatly relieved to understand why he “doesn’t do ‘normal’” and to finally realize that “I was normal, for what I am.” This book is an articulate insight into the challenges someone with autism faces, especially without support. Robison has known loneliness and been treated poorly. He was rigid, anxious, rejected, and lacked empathy and in response those around him got angry, impatient, and frustrated. He ultimately learned social skills on his own and after dropping out of high school, found his niche with local musicians as an engineer which led to touring with KISS, a job at Milton Bradley, and he ultimately opened his own car repair and restoration shop. After all the challenges, leaving school, struggling with personal relationships, and missed job opportunities, he discovers that having Asperger’s “isn’t all bad.” Robison asserts that it can “bestow rare gifts,” particularly the powers of concentration. His whole story is wonderful, but he has a few chapters (“Empathy,” “One with the Machine,” and “Logic vs. Small Talk”) that stand alone as great insights into how those with autism think differently from those who are “normal.” One insight the book provides is into how attitudes toward those with autism have come a long way. “Rather than take a close and sympathetic look at me, it proved easier and less controversial for the professionals to say I was just lazy, or angry, or defiant.” But most of all, this is a hopeful story of one man who has struggled to create a very successful professional and personal life (he has a son and is happily remarried). Robison states, “I am proud to be an Aspergian.” And in response to the oft-heard command of the title, he says “In fact, I don’t really understand why it’s considered normal to stare at someone’s eyeballs.”